Proud Pixies: Why Girls With Short Hair Are NOT Damaged

Some of you may have seen this absolutely asinine article posted on the Return of Kings blog already. Now, while I had not heard of this site before, the tagline “for masculine men” with an author commenting on “specialties in dating culture, social intelligence, and the state of masculinity” basically sums up the expected level of frat-tastic douchebaggery that shall follow.

In an article this week entitled “Girls With Short Hair are Damaged” the illiberal (and rather narcissistic) author claims that short hair is basically the biggest mistake a woman could ever make  because in so many words, it’s ugly. Period, no exceptions. When one claims only some can ‘pull off’ such a style, the blogger’s retort is that  “Just because you have enough left-over attractiveness to remain bangable after cutting off your hair doesn’t mean you wouldn’t look better with it back on”.  He’s a real prize, as you can see. The author further notes that not only do all women look worse with short hair, but that men universally hate short hair on women. (Because you know, the only reason us women have hair is for men to appreciate it.)

 

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He further insinuated that those gentlemen who claim to like short crops are simply taking advantage of the fact that girls with short hair are apparently easy. I would say that is quite the generalization, but based off of his experiences with short haired girls, I can kind of see where the guy is coming from. I would, however, note his questionable judgement in women; it’s always a good sign to see a man more interested in the length of a woman’s hair than being concerned with them being ‘roommates with a prostitute’ or “harbor(ing) twisted rape fantasies”. But hey, to each his own. It sure sounds like he has his priorities right and is great at picking out these true ladies.

I think what pissed me off the most about the article though is the statement that “Short hair is a political statement”.  While I personally think that a woman can wear her hair any way she damn pleases, I can attest that for most women, it isn’t a matter of politics. I have a number of friends from all across the political spectrum who have kept their hair short for everything from those political statements, to climate, to their own personal style. That begin said, I did not have that same option as these women he claims are doing it to make a statement or bring attention to themselves. After having waist length hair for the majority of my life, I ended up having to buzz my head a few years back due to impending baldness per chemotherapy. I begrudgingly donated my ponytail and accepted the next three years of potential regrowth. I wasn’t making a political statement, and I sure as hell wasn’t doing it for more attention. I did at first associate short hair as something boys more frequently had (not your typical view of femininity if you must)–and thus dreaded having a pixie, and the entire growing out process. Though I received many compliments, I decided that short hair was just not my personal style, yet I fully embraced it while it lasted. Bows, headbands, over the top earrings. I made it work for me. Through the entire process of growing it out, I learned that femininity doesn’t come from the length of your hair, nor the myriad of other things you can potentially strap to your head as distractions from it. But rather it comes from how you carry yourself: how you want others to view you. I didn’t need two feet of hair to tell me that I was feminine, and nor should the rest of the world.

 

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Despite the author’s assertions, not all of us women would “rather die” than cut our hair. I lost my hair so that I would live. Short hair did not make me more abrasive, masculine, deranged, or (especially) ‘easy’–it made me a stronger, more confident person, inside and out. The only perceived lack of self confidence I ever felt with short hair was due to assholes like him trying to tell me that I was any less feminine for rocking a hairstyle that doesn’t suit the cookie cutter gender roles that some men try to set our for society. While I am very far from your typical bra-burning feminist, the unbelievably sexist remarks made in the article made me realize that while women have come so far to overcome the 80 cents to a dollar and other societal inequalities, the unfortunate plight still exists, and is being solely perpetrated by these self-proclaimed “masculine men” spewing propaganda such as this to make women feel bad about a choice that should in fact make them more confident about themselves, their appearance, and their independence.

It’s true- some men don’t like short hair, and that’s something they choose. To be fair, I don’t really like men with long hair. But again, that’s also why I don’t date generally date them. I also don’t trash every single long-haired man on the internet, suggesting that his style means he is not ‘masculine enough’ by my standards. I was blessed enough to find someone during my short-hair time who did enjoy my pixie cut. To his dismay, I grew it out–but I grew it out for ME. Real men take a stand for women and their independent choices, not expect them to conform to society just to make the establishment happy.

Short hair is proof that I am far from damaged; it shows that I am a survivor. I am proud of my (former) pixie cut. And you, sir, are exactly what is wrong with society.

 

xo SA

poppin’ my collar

Here’s DIY I have become a major fan of lately….

While the world is full of sneaker heads, I have become more of a rare breed: T-shirt head… T-shirt fan? Tee-queen? I don’t know what you may call it but the reality is, I love T-shirts and I have far too many. T-shirts are easy to come by especially as a college kid/grad. People keep handing them to you without reserve. This doesn’t mean I also haven’t also invested in quite a few of my own. I have ones from places I have been to, sentimental value ones, ones with cool sayings, nice ones, and even some that serious need to be retired but I can’t seem to let go. The bigger problem is that even though I have so many categories of shirts, they are rarely appropriate for wherever I am going.

So I finally did let go of few… Well in theory and shape…and my mom made me a T-shirt quilt as a graduation present. It was a long awaited project and she had been wanting to make one since I was in middle school but she finally put all my shirts together and made one. Although with the given amount of t-shirts I still have, she has started on a second one.

So while she has been using the tees I cannot part with but cannot wear. I have been experimenting with some of my own ideas. I have made the t-shirt bags, necklaces, restructured shirts and even just used the fabric for other projects but nothing quite solved my problem as this DIY.

I figure this is my solution for shirts I still want to wear because it maintains the integrity of the “t-shirt” while sprucing it up and still making it viable to be used in a quilt later. Most importantly it takes out the only thing I hate about t-shirts: the annoyingly tight necklines.

So all I really did was pic out two shirts I like for a test run. Picked some ribbon. Played a round with neckline shapes and went for it. They turned out better than I imagined and I fully intend to do this many more shirts.

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While they are still “t-shirts”, I like the flair and they are way more useful and exciting to me now.

I fully plan on playing with the idea of pockets, elbow patches (for long sleeve tees and sweaters) and of course more collar shapes.. So stayed tuned to see what happens!

Have you tried this before? Have any tips? Any other fix your wardrobe ideas? Post them below and I’ll give them a go!

Toddles,

ac

Oh hot damn, this is my jam-tini

I read about this intriguing recipe incorporating jam into cocktails today, and naturally, had to try it for myself. Jam/jelly/preserves are one of those things that I undoubtedly have lying around somewhere in the back of my fridge for one of those once-every-3-months moments that I’m dying for a PB&J, so may as well put it to use. And for a fruity drink? Of course!

I rounded up what I had for ingredients in the house that sound like they could mix well (and I swear, it came out AMAZING!)

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As a Massachusetts gal, I feel like it’s a staple to have beach plum jam in the house. Aside from it just tasting better then grape/strawberry,etc, it is used more for baked goods rather than your childhood lunchtime fav. This unlikely suspect provided a unique (and somewhat more adult, I suppose) spin to my jam-tini adventures. For those of you who have yet to discover this magical delight, you should really try it for a fun change. It’s native fruit to Cape Cod, and tastes somewhere between a plum and a cranberry, however I haven’t really ever seen it used for many things besides jam (learn more here).

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First, I simmered a heaping teaspoon of the jam with about a teaspoon of agave. The agave boils pretty quickly, but as soon as the jam turns into a liquid and combines with the syrup, you should be good to go.

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Second, I juiced my lime. I ended up using one lime per martini to ensure an extra zing. (As a side note, can I mention how great of an idea hand juicers are? I never used one until my roommate got one, and now I am placing it on my list of kitchen necessities.)

I then mixed the lime juice with the agave/beach plum mixture and poured over ice. Then came a shot of elderflower liqueur followed by a shot of coconut rum.

Shake, pour in a pretty glass, and voila!

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As you can see from the photo, the jam/agave ended up forming little droplets almost in the bottom of the glass . It’s a bit hard to swish and mix, however the flavor still combines nicely and almost gives you a (classy, but) jello-shot like texture on the bottom.

Overall, I have decided that jam (or in this case beach plum jelly) is a unique but awesome alternative cocktail mixer if you’re looking to be a bit fancy and impress without having to really go beyond the contents of your kitchen. I generally like most fruity drinks, but this is definitely on top of my list of new favorites!

Have you used jam/jelly before in mixed drinks? Successful or bad experience?

xo SA